Managing Emotions When The Holidays Are Nearing
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The Holidays are drawing near. For many of us, this can be extremely stressful. At a time that is expected to be filled with joy, many struggle with feelings of grief and loss, being overwhelmed by changes in routine, being around unsupportive family, and many other issues that pop up this time of year.
Because this time of year can be difficult, it's important to put in place some self-care strategies to help cope as you navigate through the holidays in a healthy way.
1. Set realistic expectations.
If attending three holiday parties in one weekend seems exhausting, give yourself permission to only go to one or two (or none). If planning the holiday meal is too overwhelming, ask for help. Create a reasonable budget for gifts, and don't exceed it (even if that budget is $0.00). Keeping your expectations for the season realistic will allow you to resist the pressures that the season can bring.
2. It's okay to feel sad or lonely.
Feelings of sadness, loneliness, or grief don't suddenly go away because of the holidays. In fact, these feelings are often intensified during this time of the year. There is room for these feelings during the holidays. You can choose to express these feelings or not--it's absolutely up to you. But give yourself permission to have these feelings and to nurture them in whatever way feels right to you.
3. Eat and drink in moderation.
Holidays often lead to excess consumption of food and alcohol. Monitoring this is important. Avoid over consumption if you are feeling down. It often only increases our feelings of distress.
4. Don't isolate
Take time for yourself if you need it! But don't isolate yourself. Spend time with people that are supportive and understanding. Don't be afraid to reach out to community service agencies if you need additional support.
5. Be aware of triggers
For some, the holidays may bring triggers of grief or trauma. Be aware of these, and have a plan to cope. Is there a supportive friend that can be with you or be available for a call? Do you have effective coping or relaxation skills to regulate yourself? Do you have an exit strategy if you need to leave a gathering? Having a plan in place can make you feel more prepared for the challenges the day may bring.
6. Change things up!
Try something new for the holiday season. Volunteer, spend the day with friends instead of family, or take a small trip. You can spend the holidays in whatever way feels good to you, traditions be damned!
7. Follow the Holiday Bill of Rights
Captured in the image above, the Holiday Bill of Rights is a brief but helpful guideline to remembering your boundaries during the holiday season. Reflect on the ways that you can honor yourself and your feelings during the season.
May we all navigate the holidays mindfully and honor our needs.
Written by Kayla Renteria, LPCC - mental health counselor with Renteria Counseling in Louisville, KY
I work with children, adolescents, and adults with a variety of presenting concerns. Many of my clients come to me with concerns related to anxiety, depression, relationship issues, and past trauma. My experience as a therapist has provided me the opportunity to work alongside clients from many different walks of life. My philosophy on treatment is to empower my clients through a trusting relationship, compassion for their situation, understanding that they are doing the best they can with what they have, and a good measure of humor to keep things real. I specialize in treating trauma, depression, and anxiety.
I am also trained in EMDR, a highly effective and efficient treatment modality for trauma and mood disorders. I know how uncomfortable it can be to address painful moments in the past and present. I am honored to walk alongside my clients as we work to heal the past and move forward in a healthy way.
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